Conversation

Have you moved in with your parents? Have they moved in with you? The economic collapse is spawning many different coping strategies, including combining households to cut down on housing expenses. Since this is happening anyway, now is a great time to learn the skill of living well with others. Effective communication is a key element for a harmonious life. Here are three highly effective techniques that can lead to dramatically better communication and more fulfilled lives.

Karen Heart, LSCW, developed the The Better Communication Technique after watching couples struggle to hear and be heard. This technique is easy to learn and guaranteed to bring results if practiced. Download the tutorial at the link.

Deep listening in a circle of trust, described in Parker Palmer’s Hidden Wholeness, lets you hear yourself as you really are, rather than who you think you are. You might be surprised at what you hear. The effect can be profound.

Using Byron Katie’s The Work, you can drill down to find what about a person or situation upsets you. It is never what you think. One woman was angry at her husband for getting old. After doing “the work” she realized that she was angry at herself for getting old. When she realized that, she felt an immediate release that allowed her to be more loving and compassionate with herself and with her husband. Projecting onto others is rampant, guaranteed to mess up your thinking and, therefore, your relationships. We always think the problem is “out there”, when in fact it is burrowed in our mis-perceptions and faulty thinking.

All three techniques are powerful tools for improving your relationships and your life. Working with a counselor who is trained in these techniques is probably more economical, and faster, than traditional talk therapy. The Better Communication Technique is a free, down loadable document. Don’t live with resentment as your daily fare. Find and use tools and techniques that are widely available and affordable.